In fact, if we can keep reminding ourselves of what is my primary purpose? We go to the gym, and we want to avoid a few exercises, because it’s very stressful. But why did you go to the gym? Because your legs were weak. Now you don’t want to do leg exercise, you have forgotten the primary purpose for which you enrolled yourself into the gym. What is the primary purpose?
I’m starting my own business because before 25, I want to be taking home at least one crore. Some sacrifices are required. It’s not even called a sacrifice. Some focus is required. You can’t continue to live as a college student, the lifestyle of a college student and expect to see one crore before you are 25. You want to see one crore before 25, then you will have to keep reminding yourself when you get distracted by your friends, when you get distracted by activities happening around you. You have to ask yourself this question – what is the primary purpose for which I started my own business?
The number of fights you will not even get into in a husband-and-wife relationship, useless fights. Useful fights, it’s okay… useless fights. You are not spending time with me, so let’s fight. So that, that’ll make you spend time with me. If only you can remind yourself… – I went into this relationship because I wanted to enhance my love and happiness in life. I went into the relationship because I wanted companionship. And what am I focusing right now on? Who is right? Who is wrong? The ego…whether you are doing it, or I should do it… why… where have I gone into this transactional mode? For you I am doing so much, how much are you doing for me?
When I make somebody happy are you not happy in the process? When I love somebody don’t you feel loved in the entire process? When I hug somebody am I not hugged in the entire process? When I improve the quality of my relationship with him, am I not also enjoying a better marriage in the entire process? The only way you can get into a transactional mindset in a relationship is you have forgotten – what is the primary purpose for which I came into this relationship?
One question… and repeatedly asked, not once. Repeatedly reminded yourself, Some of you, you started business to make money. That was your primary focus. Right now, there are non-performers in the organization, and you are saying pavam… (Poor thing…) If in case, for his non-performance I let him go, what will his family do? If he loses his job his family will suffer, he should be more concerned about it and perform. You should not be concerned about it. If a few non-performers do not lose their job on account of non-performance, very soon you’ll build an organization of mediocrity because everybody will take their place… you’ll build a government office. Where everybody gets this feeling, – whether I perform or not, my job is secure, why? Because I have a nice kindhearted boss. You want to be a nice kindhearted… Start an NGO. Represent a purpose, reach out to the world. Don’t build a business for that. If you have built a business for that then it has to be driven by performance culture. If it is not driven by performance culture then do something…. What is the primary purpose for which you have built a business? You are representing a purpose; money is not the point of focus… If at all, it’s a by-product. You can build a very different culture there.
The central theme for everything is this one question – what was my primary purpose when I started this? What is the primary purpose for which I am going there? What is the primary purpose? For example, don’t get me wrong. There are people who have started cycling, they use some other word – spinning. Because they wanted to do 45 minutes or one hour of cardio exercise. Then a gang set ho jaataa hai…other spinners come. Then all the spinners tell each other, shall we go up to Mahabalipuram and come or Sinhagad and come, depending upon whichever place there… Bangalore one exclusive road is there, Bangalore-Hyderabad Highway! It’s only for spinners and bikers, let’s go there. So suddenly, it is becoming two hours every day, because vo gang set ho gayaa (A gang is set). Ek chai peena hai, udhar (You need to drink tea there…) we all meet there, so chai peena (drink tea). So suddenly in the morning the family doesn’t get to see you.
What did you start this for? 45 minutes of cardio burn, now you are not able to go to work at 9:30 because by the time you finish also, suddenly now working hours have been shifted…Are you clear about it? I’m not saying you don’t have to. Are you clear about it? Suddenly I don’t hear any reports of – your success in business, because business is not growing. Why business is not growing? Because the talks between North Korea and America did not go well. What is your business? I’m selling jewelry in Chennai. Yenna connection. (What is the connection?) Puriyalaye Enaku. (I am not able to understand.) But ethavathu oru reason Venum! (But some reason is needed!)
So now you need an alternative success for you to feel successful. So, I ran 10 km today. I’m planning to run Marathon next week. After that I’m planning to go biking for 100 km Ethavathu Idea Irukka? (Do you have some idea?) Somewhere you want to be… what is that fellow? Seven times… Armstrong. You want to do something like that, I can understand this. Suddenly, every day, two and a half hours, three hours goes off in running or spinning. Business is not growing, family is not getting your time and suddenly there is this superficial relationships, which is getting all your time. Now the focus has become that we spin in the morning, and we drink in the evening. So, three hours in the morning and three hours in the evening goes. Then your wife is feeling, you are no more giving time and this is an issue. Obviously, it’s an issue, because… and you are telling your wife, ‘You have to understand… finally I found something to enjoy in life, this also I should not enjoy?’ No, you are not enjoying. You have created an easier alternative for you to feel successful.
Because this is an easy way to feel successful, 10 km becomes 12 km you’ll feel successful. Nothing else will happen. You are not getting the gratification of feeling successful in your business right now, you don’t know how to take your business to the next level, you have simply created an alternative, addiction for you, which is giving you a false sense of success so ……because beyond a stage this is not exercise, this is indulgence. If you somewhere lift a weight and do 15 reps and you do three sets and come, its exercise. Whole day you are walking with dumbbells… somebody… even in infinipath he is sitting there, doing this… lose dane athu? (Crazy isn’t?) That is not called exercise!
Somewhere I have to keep asking myself this question – What is the primary purpose for which I have come to this college? What is my primary purpose for which I’ve gone to this university? What is the primary purpose for which I have started this business? What is the primary purpose for which I’ve shifted jobs? What is my primary purpose for going to HDB (spiritual retreat)? What is my primary purpose with infinipath (weekly growth sessions)? What is my primary responsibility towards my family? What is my primary success? Am I cheating myself on my primary success by creating lot of secondary and third-rate success? And somewhere creating this artificial satisfaction that I am success, and I am not actually succeeding in my primary success, which alone can alter my life. All this will not alter my life.
